Friday, May 4, 2012

Clothing Optional

So we live in Europe where nudity is acceptable. Actually, they don't have the nekkid issues we do. Completely nude spas, oh and they are co-ed. Topless sunbathing. Men in barely-there speedos. So ok. You get used to the porn on television after 10pm. You stop gawking at the porn plastered on the screens at the bars. It becomes part of the culture. You learn to deal.

(Enter stage left- The Princess)

She is acclimating quite well to this new culture. She is a nudist.

There I said it. I should feel better facing the truth but NO I don't feel better.

She would rather be naked. She said so herself. She doesn't like clothing. She doesn't particularly like underwear.

This is really scary! She's built quite shapely (much to mine and her Dad's chagrin) and she has legs that seem to stretch across the Atlantic. We won't even talk about her bubble butt, which used to be SOOOO cute when she was 4 and now at 17 I wish I could lop off with a spork!

She walks around the house in her bra and underwear. She forgets to close her blinds when she is dressing. She HAS NO FRIGIN' SHAME! She was walking around in her underwear last weekend when our friend's 15 year old walked into our hotel room. He was all dumb struck and stuttery, she was all "it's like a bathing suit bottom anyways".

Really??? Seriously??? Do you know how awkward that apology is? Went something like this:

Me: "Oh yea....sorry J. I don't know what she was thinking when D came in and she was in her t-shirt and underwear?"

J: awkard laughter "it's whatever! She is right it is like a bathing suit bottom."

Next day. Family football. Our family versus theirs. Princess in spanks and that's it. No one else knew she was free jaying but I did. That was enough.

I sit here shaking my head thinking when did I start raising a nudist? When did my sweet innocent little monkey turn into this alien from planet Teendom?

The worst part is that she isn't coy about it. She isn't flaunting or flirty with her body image. She is just comfortable with who she is and that is great. That is what makes this whole thing so difficult! Do I condone this newfound freedom or do I squash her self-image and tell her nudity is wrong? There has to be a happy medium. We won't even get into the options she has for clothing these days. Talk about parading around damn near naked. Clothing options for teens are either booty shorts or short booty shorts.

Fuck. {insert frustration and confusion here}

I should've seen it coming when she was 3. She loved streaking. She would rip her underwear off and run around the house "nakey." She would shriek with laughter and tell me "Look Ma, I nakey! Look my hiney ma!"

Yea... I should have stopped it then. Oh wait! I did.

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1 comment:

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