Challenge Accepted... and COMPLETED!

Sixty days ago I started a challenge. It was a simple invite by a friend to join a challenge group. I really had no idea what I was getting into, but I said yes. I said Yes, because I trusted that she wouldn't steer me wrong. I trusted when she said she had gotten results and she loved the products. I trusted her because I have known her for many years, and she is one of the most sincere and vulnerable people I know. So I said sure! What did I have to lose right? Ok, so I have about 30 lbs to lose, but who's keeping track?

Besides for trusting her, she also happen to catch me at the right time. I was feeling large, sluggish, and downright bleh! We had recently moved into our  new home, and I wasn't taking care of myself. I needed to get back into shape. By the looks of me you would never have guessed that I had completed a half-marathon in Sept 2013. I wanted needed something, someone, that would hold me accountable to daily goals and activities. Never mind the fact that I had watched Shaun T's Focus T25 informercial for the 4th time, and was really contemplating buying it. I already owned Slim in 6, Insanity and P90X- all great BeachBody programs. Many years back when I purchased Slim in 6, it helped me get in shape- but that was YEARS ago. 

Focus T25 really appealed to me for 1 main reason: it was done in 25 minutes. No hour long workouts that seemed to go on forever. Shaun T was promising me that I could be done in the time it takes to watch most sitcoms. So yeah, I purchased T25 in a Challenge Pack which came with this Shakeology shake powder stuff. 

What I never could've have predicted was the change the Challenge Group, T25 and Shakeology would have on my life. 

What's a Challenge Group?

The Challenge Group was a private Facebook group where all the participants could share their concerns and needs during the challenge. Everyday the group leaders would post a different daily activity. These activities would range from examining your daily eating habits to learning the power of positive speak. Everyday you were required to do your BeachBody workout, mine was Focus T25, which I LOVE! You were also required to have Shakeology on HomeDirect, which essentially is having Shakeology delivered monthly. 

I can't tell you how the Challenge Group truly helped me evaluate my fitness and nutrition. I helped me to understand how I focused on comparing MY journey to everyone else's, which ultimately always derailed my success. 

I learned how to appreciate my small victories and turn them into daily affirmations of how to continue along with my journey. 

I learned to eat clean, and drink enough water daily to sink a ship. Ok, so I'm not really sinking a ship, but some days I pee enough that it feels like I could drown a ship. 

I also learned that there are many people like me trying to get fit, struggling with the ups and downs of life, and learning to forgive themselves for slipping. 

That, my friends, is priceless!

Twenty-Five Minutes a Day is So Doable

The most often used excuse for not exercising is TIME. Well BeachBody and Mr. Ripped In Shape Shaun T have created a program that helps you lose the weight and get in shape in about 29 minutes a day. The program is called Focus T25, and the actual workout is 25 minutes long, and then you add about 2.5-3.5 minutes of cool and BAM! YOU ARE DONE! 

Don't get me wrong, the workout is NO JOKE! You will sweat your butt off, and you will feel like you are going to die that first week. Shaun T LOVES him some lunges and squats, which does wonders for the look of your legs and buttocks...but let me tell you, you're gonna be sore as heck! Just stick with it! 

Shaun T breaks it down into two phases, Alpha and Beta. Both phases have a trainer demonstrating modified low-impact versions of his exercises. You never feel like you CAN'T do it because there is ALWAYS a low-impact option. It was great because as I started getting stronger I could modify the modified exercise and do something closer to what Shaun T was doing, if not exactly what he was doing. It gave me something to progress towards, which is always feels good and gives you motivation. 

If you have struggled with motivation and time, Focus T25 is the best thing out there. Just when you think you have nothing left in the tank, you've got like 5 minutes left and let's be honest, you can do anything for 5 minutes. 

Plus it must be said that Shaun T is quite a looker and there are certain workouts where he is shirtless, and that my friends is worth looking at for 25 minutes- even if I'm sweaty, smelly, and huffing n' puffing like I'm climbing Everest. It's all good! 

Shake Up Your Nutrition

Before this challenge I had no clue what Shakeology was about, actually I had never even heard of it. So imagine my surprise when I received this bag of powder and I was supposed to drink it once a day.  Really? An expensive meal replacement shake was doing to do the trick?  Umm as a matter of fact... YES! 

What Shakeology did for me was simple. It helped me cut, actually I would go out on a limb and say eliminate, my carb cravings. Let's face it, I'm Puerto Rican and we like rice and beans, and bread and heavy starchy foods. I haven't had rice in 60 days. I don't crave pasta anymore. I still like my occasional bread, but who doesn't like Italian bread in dippy olive oil? Moderation right?

Shakeology is just amazing! I've seen complaints about the taste and truthfully, I loved it. But I'm a chocoholic so getting a rich thick chocolate shake in the morning suits me just fine. It's easy to blend, doesn't stay clumpy of powdery and they even send you recipe ideas to add different tastes to it. I use water or almond milk, but there are ideas for other blends. They even have the super vegan blend for those looking for no animal products. I can't say enough great things about Shakeology! Find me here if you want more info or just want to hear me rant and rave about Shakeology! 

Results? Nah, let's call them Successes!

This is the part most people care about- it's the determining factor if the products worked, right? Let me start by saying that I'm eating cleaner and healthier than I have since I was on formula, and who knows how good that crap was in the 70s. I've cut out processed foods. I've cut out sodas and simple sugars. I've cut out all white flour and bleached flours. I've been watching sodium and GMO content. I eat veggies and protein like it's my job. I just feel better about my relationship with food. So that is a HUGE SUCCESS!

Another huge success was actually getting smaller! Who knew? Yes I did lose inches and weight. I lost 12 pounds to be exact since I started this journey. It hasn't always been easy, but I did it. I still have a ways to go, and by no means is my journey over.  I will continue with Shakeology and I'm starting a new program called PiYo (Pilates and Yoga combo). I can't finish my T25 due to this ankle injury, but I will attempt the low-impact of PiYo, so I'm excited about that!              

I also completed another 5k run in May, and my first Mud Run last Saturday (which caused the jacked up ankle).  So I would venture to say that I'm more physically fit than I was 60 days ago, no doubt. 

No matter what the combination of the FB support group, the daily activities in the Challenge Group, the physical workouts and the Shakeology all came together in a PERFECT recipe for success. I'm so grateful for that invite from my friend. I'm so inspired by my journey that I want to help other Moms who think they can't do or think they don't have time, that they can make small changes that will yield large results.  I promise! I believe in it so much that I became a BeachBody Coach. I want to help other Moms entering their 40s to understand that fitness is possible at any age, and that we don't have enter our 40s the same way we left our 30s. It can be better... WAAAAY BETTER!

Color Me Happy: Happiest 5k on the Planet

Running is something that I have always wanted to be good at, be into, and enjoy. Well let's just say what I want and what I get aren't always jiving! 

I started running in earnest about a year and half ago. It started while we were stationed in Germany. Maybe it was because my great friend Jilly motivated me or maybe it was the thought of us doing a triathlon together that got me motivated, who knows. My biggest hurdle with the whole running thing has always been my damned asthma. At any rate, I started running, and enjoying it- for the most part. 

While we never did our triathlon, but I did complete a half-marathon in September 2013. The running sucked and it was exhausting, but that feeling coming across the finish line was exhilarating and unlike anything I had experienced before. It was phenomenal! 

So fast forward 7 months, with a PCS move (Permanent Change of Station for the non military folk on here), sprinkle in the stress of buying a new home and cyber schooling my 13 year old son, add on a couple of 10 pounds to all the wrong places, and what you have is a recipe for disaster. I need something to motivate me and fast!

Savannah is a city of perpetual activities for all walks of life. If you can't find something to do in Savannah you aren't looking hard enough. There is always something going on in this quaint but busy little town, and the weekend of May 17th was this year's Color Run.

They call it The Happiest 5k on the Planet, and it really is the happiest running experience- ever! Here are some reasons it's the happiest 5k, and some tips to keep you happy on race day! 

Bag and headband!

1. Cool Swag is included. Admittedly this is only my second race ever, so I'm drawing on limited experience. However, I know cool swag when I come across cool FREE swag! When we went to pick up our race day packets the day before the race and what I received truly shocked me! We had a Color Run t-shirt, rainbow colored Color Run head bands, a smaller Color Run face tattoo, and a larger HAPPY tattoo. All of this came a pretty cool colorful Color Run bag- heck they even included safety pins to attached the running bib to our shirts! Oh and did I mention that it was all FREE!

2.  Come one, come all. The attitude of the 5k is so un-racelike that you really don't feel like you are in a competition at all. The race is not timed so you never feel likes it's a death match to the end. Quite the contrary, you are truly there for the whole experience of it and the fun day! There were families with younger children walking, many with strollers even. There were people of all shapes and varying degrees of fitness. It was very inviting for everyone, even those looking to time their 5k.

Finish line dash

3. You end the race as colorful as you want to be. Indeed when you go through the color zones you can avoid getting doused with color by simply running through them quickly. There were plenty of people who didn't look the least bit "colored" when they finished the race. The amount of color you get at each zone is really dependent on how long you take going through and how much actual color you want. The first two zones were just ran through fairly quickly and had minimal colors on us. The last zones we stopped and walked through and allowed ourselves to get thoroughly colored. We even stopped, dropped and rolled in it! You have more control than you think when going through the color zones. 

4. There are tons of pictures being taken.  If you want to pose for the camera, fear not, there are plenty of photographers snapping your candids while you run amuck in the colored zones. So smile big for the camera and strike a pose! Oh and the pictures were ready to view within three days post race, which was a great turn around. 

Race day pictures

5. Pre and post race celebrations were a blast! During the pre-race workout up there was plenty of music, cheering, and just general excitement. On their stage they had several Zumba instructors conducting classes. So we joined in and got ourselves stretched and ready for the race. It was a great way to get the blood flowing and the music was jamming! Considering our race started at 8:00am and we got to the park at 6:45, I'm glad they had someone there to help get me warmed up. Now during the post race celebration, there was music and hoopla, and most of all there was color! Tons of it. In little bags they handed you when you came across the finish line. It was really too much fun! 

As with any non-standard race, there are tips and pointers that can help you get through the race and feel better at the end. Here is what I learned:

1. Take a bottle of water with you on the race, if possible. There were times when we just needed to swish with it to get some of the color dust out of our mouth (or teeth) and the water came in handy. Remember you can control the amount of color you get on you, and we were rolling in it. So we did get some in our mouth. 

2. Make sure to control your breathing. As an asthmatic I was nervous about the "dust" particles hindering my breathing and affecting my running. So for the first two color stations I was nervous about it. I used a bandana one of our teammates had to cover my nose and mouth to minimize the amount of color dust I was breathing in. The fact is that it wasn't that bad after you got used to the feeling. However, if you do suffer from any kind of breathing condition I would use caution and take a bandana or something to cover your nose and mouth. While I did make it through the run and the post celebration color-fest, I was a bit tight-chested later that evening and in through the next day. I felt wheezy so I would exercise caution if you are asthmatic. Definitely something I will consider on our next one. 

3. Your choice of clothing is important! All the color WILL NOT come out of your clothes! Since they provided a T-shirt, I wore the one I got with my swag bag. I did put on a tank top underneath- mostly because I sweat quite a bit and I didn't want the color sticking to my body. It was great because it provided a barrier between my sweat and the color, making it so much easier when it was time to bathe. The areas where sweat pooled the most, got colored the most- like the backs of my knees, crooks of my arms and the back of my neck. The crooks of my arms were a weird purple and blue! Hah! In addition to having on an undershirt or tank top, make sure you wear that rainbow headband they give you. It's hot here in Savannah, but thankfully it wasn't terrible on the race day. Despite the cooler temps, I still was sweating like a pig! The headband really helps to keep the sweat out of your eyes, which in turn keeps the color at bay. Always a plus!

4. Ears, hands and feet will stay colored for days. Despite many attempts to remove all the color from these areas, it was just impossible to do. My hands and ears had blue color on/in them for many days later. My daughter's feet were blue and my son couldn't manage to get the blue color off his neck. While most of the color will fade and disappear, just be prepared if you have the huge meeting with the big boss that following week that you don't walk in looking like you loved on a smurf. 

5. Protect your belongings. There will be places you don't want this color to get into, so make sure you protect your belongings. For starters, put your cell phone or camera in a zip loc bag or be prepared to have a colored dusted phone. My phone case is pink and by the end of the run it was dirty and looked awful. When we were done with the run we walked around and went to lunch, giving us plenty of time to "lose" quite a bit of color- remember it's a corn starch dust so it will brush off and shake out if you try. That being said remember that you will have to get back into your car eventually and this is where a sheet or towel come in handy. We didn't change clothes but that could be an option to- but you could get other clothes colored. 

6. Wash with like colors.  With 4 Color Run participants it was easy to wash all of our colored clothing together. They provided a Shout color sheet in our swag bag and I used it to help collect the loose color in the wash. Almost everything came out clean, except my tank top which still has remnants of the colors. To be safe, just make sure you don't put other laundry in with your Color Run clothes.  

It was a great family experience. The kids loved it and so did we! We had fun and would recommend it to anyone looking for a little fitness and fun rolled into one. It is a truly Happy experience, and one I know we will do again!

Family fun

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Keeping my days straight

It's Day 5 and it's been a great week! I can't say it's been easy, it rarely is when making such changes, but I feel accomplished going into the last "strict" day. Actually I have been challenged this week by those closest to me. From the grandmother wanting Dairy Queen Grill, to having to stop and get her Wendy's before her flight home, this week has been a challenge and test of willpower. 

Oh did I mention I passed with flying colors? I did!!!!

I have worked out every day, and the one day I couldn't Wednesday, I double stacked my workouts on Thursday. I feel great! My only problem has been the absence of caffeine. I don't drink black coffee, so I went two days without coffee, realized I needed it, and then broke down and had a Skinny Caffe Mocha. The bright side is that it is only 110 calories. 

My body is sore as shit. I ache everywhere and yet, I can't wait to see how my transformation takes place. And if you are wondering how hard the exercise has been- it's been grueling! The food/meal plan has been great though! 

In an effort to help me monitor my activity level, steps and caloric burn, I went out and bought a Fitbit Flex. Love it! It helps monitor my steps, it estimates my caloric burn (I'm not sure how accurate this is, but oh well), it monitors my sleep patterns, and over activity minutes. The best thing that I like is that it has an app that works with my iPhone and the FitBit syncs with my other awesome app, My Fitness Pal. My Fitness Pal (MFP) helps to track your meals and calories over the day. So the two of them talking and syncing is great! The only draw back from FitBit is that it doesn't track your heart rate so there is no real way to know how you burn during a workout. So to fix this I went out and purchased WahooFitness Heart Rate Monitor which syncs with my iPhone and it syncs with my running app and MFP. Hopefully with all these new gadgets I can monitor my progress and really see what's changing and how to make improvements. I really think that will be a huge motivator!

 Overall I'm doing great and going strong! I feel good and I think this next week will be a kick in the ass with the workouts but I can do it. Hell the workouts are only 25 minutes. I can do anything for 25 minutes, right?

Here is to Day 5, and a great weekend!

For the record, I have not been paid or received ANY compensation for my commentary on FitBit, MyFitnessPal and WahooFitness monitor. I'm just relaying my experiences with these health gadgets. :)

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Starting from 1

All journeys start at the same point: Day 1. Yesterday was the first day in the journey to changing my eating habits and changing my life. 

It really wasn't as bad as I thought it would be! I had 5 meals during the course of the day, and really never felt that hungry. The only time I felt a bit hungry was in the latter part of the evening after dinner. I kinda felt like dinner wasn't enough and was munchy. I really can't tell you if I was still hungry or just needed something to munch on, so I drank more water to try to fill up my stomach. 

Believe it or not... it worked! :) Overall the food wasn't bad and I was pleasantly surprised with the combinations of foods. The only thing I missed was coffee! I didn't have any coffee and I felt it by way of a headache. Hopefully that will subside over time, considering I can't have coffee the way I like it. My options are black coffee or no coffee. I'm obviously choosing no coffee, that could change in the very near future. 

As for the exercise, that was an asskicker. T25's day one was a cardio kick in the rear. I could barely keep up with the exercises, so about 90% of the workout was completed following the modifications chick! Yea, that was the best I could do, but it was a start for Day 1. 

Overall, it was a good day! I would give it a 5 out 5 stars! Onward and upward to Day 2.

Tomorrow it starts!!

Monday, April 28th will be the first day of the next part of my life. I'm making a lifestyle change. I am giving myself 60 days to make it a habit and make it part of my routine. I am giving myself the summer to make sure this is a permanent fixture of my life. 

I can't give up and I won't let myself fail this time. I don't have it in me to fail, and I don't have it in me to continue to be this unhealthy and this bleh! Truthfully I feel fat as hell and I can't handle that anymore. So... it's time. 

I will be taking my pictures tonight and my measurements tomorrow morning. From there I will not obsess over the scale. I will allow the inches lost to be the measurement of my success. I will not obsess about falling off the wagon if I do. I will get back on track on the next meal. I will exercise once a day, and if time permits, I will walk in the evenings. I will post on my support pages and get help when I need it. 

I will succeed. 

I will not fail. 

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60 Day Challenge

So of course, you know I am obsessed with losing weight. Ok so obsession is a bit harsh, but it does seem like an obsession because I can't let go of the idea that I'm not the best me that I can be. Anyways, I have posted quite a few time that I'm starting over and trying again. Usually it's January and it's some stupid resolution. Blah blah blah. I also start and never finish. We seem to have a pattern here, huh?

Well now I am starting again, in April, right before summer break, and I am hoping that this will work. After arriving here stateside, I have effectively gained 15 lbs. Ouch! I know, I know. Totally self-inflicted. I get it!

I was recently asked by an old friend to join this 60-day weight loss, life-style altering challenge. She claimed the program she was using actually worked for her. Now mind you, she is slender and really probably could have lost 5 lbs calibrating her scale, I mean that is how small she is, but oh well. As it was, I was already looking into purchasing the Shaun-T T25 program, which is part of the Beachbody line, so it seemed like a win win for me! I joined the challenge, purchased the DVDs and joined the FB page.

This week starts the prep week of the 60-day challenge.  The group and coaches are getting everyone in the mindset, helping us in understanding the programs, and offering helpful hints to keep everyone on track. It really seems like it will be a supportive group. I created my first YouTube video in order to introduce myself and well I'm not working, have time, and have minimal excuses. It's now or never folks. 

At any rate, I plan on posting my daily food, exercise journal here. Let's see how that goes. I'm trying to stay accountable to the group and myself. I even have my best friend in PA joining in on the exercise with me! It should be exactly what I need! 

I'll keep you posted! Here is to post #1 on the road to the Challenge.

Fat looks better tanned.

It's the third week in January, and it's my third week on this here thirteenth journey down Weight Loss Lane. Conservatively I have attempted this every year for the last thirteenth years. Conservatively. No bullshit.

Salad or chocolate? That's a no brainer!

I don't know that I have been "fat" all my life, but I have struggled with the yo-yo of weight gain and loss. I think a lot of women struggle through this. My struggles are no different than the next person's and truth is I might not be struggling if I hadn't started my Mommy-Hood so early in life. 

Maybe I would have enjoyed my youthfulness for longer. Maybe I would have learned better eating habits and workout strategies. Maybe I would have learned to combat stress without overindulging. Maybe if my aunt had balls she would be my uncle. There are a shit ton of maybes that change absolutely nothing. 

None of those maybes count. What counts now are the number of times I have attempted and summarily failed at losing the weight and keeping it off. What counts now is that I am tired of it. What really counts, and I hate this part, is that I am fucking getting older. It's no longer as easy to get rid of the excess poundage. What counts is that my body is not cooperating with the weight loss. What counts is that I am trying my damnedest and I am not even seeing minimal results. What counts is how the hell am I going to push myself through this until I do see some results. 

What counts is how I overcome my past habits and instill new ones.

I have been doing well these past 3 weeks. I have been exercising about 4-5 days a week, some days 2 a days. I have been trying to keep my step count above 10k every day. I have been counting calories and tracking what I eat. I have been weighing and measuring my protein (meat) and choosing fresh veggies and eating more of them. I have increase my water intake astronomically, and decreased my sugar. I am going what I am supposed to. 

Then why does the scale fucking hate me?

That darn thing hates me. I think it's sole purpose in it's existence is to torture people. I bet in medieval times people were put on those balance scales and placed in the center of town for all to see, right outside the church- maximum visibility. They would offset the weight of the individual with rocks or mud which is where the term big as a house could've come from. They were balancing your fat ass with all the makings of a thatched home... so you were big as a house. Or maybe fat as hell came from there as well considering you were outside the church and only the devil could have made someone so gluttonous. (Oh shit... that is my Catholic guilt talking there. Ignore this last statement. My bad... I went a lil' overboard there. It's that Catholic self-loathing....deeply ingrained. Carry on.) That is my theory anyways....

Those numbers are my albatross. 

For starters I can't get an accurate reading ANYWHERE in the fecking house. I move the scale from one room to the next, trying to find level ground, and I can gain and lose 7 pounds in the process. There isn't one piece of level tile in this here establishment. So I get on it this morning....BAM! I am 189 pounds! Nothing like 3 numbers to bring you to tears. 

Tears. I know melodramatic. But when last week I had lost just shy of 3 lbs, watching those number creep in the wrong direction is heartbreaking. 

Then I move the scale again. BAM! I am 187.9. Really? 

I strip down to my bra and underwear. Move it again....186. Move it... 185. I figure if I keep moving it maybe just the process alone will have me shedding 10, 15, 20 pounds. Uggh. I am frustrated.

Look I just want a small victory. A pound or two. Something to keep my going and motivated. Something that let's me know that I am doing this right. Anything? Bueller?

So I am staying off the scale until tomorrow morning for my Biggest Loser weigh in. When in doubt... I might go tan. Fat looks better tanned. 

Pray that I don't throw the darn thing from the second story window. 

Pray that I don't have to start this shit over again in 2014, 'cause this shit is getting old. Fast. 

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Weight loss: EPIC FAIL

I do it every year. And every year I fail at it.

I started in December 2006. I lost a shit ton of weight by Spring 2007. Then summer happened, and I slowly packed it back on. Every year since then I have tried but I can't manage to finish it, much less keep it off.

Just look at my sparkpeople profile. It reads like a bad nightmare. Like a string of failed resolutions. Like groundhog day, every year.

Jan 2012: Here we go again! It seems every year I try to do this again, and every year I fail to some degree. Not this year. I found a workout buddy. I don't have the same level of work responsibilities. So I have decided to go big or go home. I tend to go home but not this time. I am training for a Triathlon! I have joined a local Biggest Loser contest and have joined several smaller challenges. I have a swim challenge at my local pool, and a circuit training challenge at the gym. So let's see if all these challenges can motivate me to a healthier lifestyle. 

April 2011: Ummm yea so I could literally copy what I wrote last May and it would read the same. What to do? Can't get motivated and skinny pictures are not motivating enough? HEEELLLPPP!! 

May 2010: So I haven't accomplished my goals since the last time I updated my SparkPage. I feel horrible and I can't express how disillusioned I am with myself. I ordered the DVD collection, Slim in 6 and I am planning to start Monday May 10. I will post here and show my progress. I want to leave my "skinny" pictures up for motivation. I am going to give it my all.... for real this time. 

January 2009: Ok, so it has been since January 2007, when I started this journey. I am now back at the 180lbs, on a good day. I can't do this anymore. I am going to join my Diva sisters and lose this crap for good! I am tired of feeling sick and tired! So here it goes, FOR GOOD! My new years' resolution is to resolve my weight issues and be a healthier me.... read below to see where I was....and where I hope to get back to! 

"My name is Melissa and last year I joined my Diva sisters in our move from BLC to SparkPeople. I was doing wonderfully! I had gone from 182lbs all the way down to 157lbs, at my lowest. Then summer came along! As a school teacher, summertime means leisure, hanging out and little structure. Needless to say I fell WAY off the wagon. Now I am back up to 179lbs and hating every bit of it, cursing myself for the lack of discipline and will power. BUT NOW I'M BACK! and I am going to achieve this goal and keep it off FOR GOOD!" 

WOW- that was my message to 'SELF' at the beginning of last year. Amazing that summer 2008 is here and I am still at the WHOPPING 175lbs. I am disappointed in my lack of follw through. So I am trying this AGAIN... because that is all I can do. I must push myself and see this through. I can't go through life feeling like a slug and justifying it to myself. SO let's see what I can do this summer!!! I am putting my money where my mouth is!! 

Horrid! I know. Look at my posts from last year about Finding Fitness.

It's all so depressing. 

The worst part is that I don't know how to break the cycle of the yo-yo. 

All I can do is start over, again and again. In the hopes that at some point it will stick and I will keep the healthy smaller version of me. 

Yeah. I am starting it again this year. I am starting the Biggest Loser again, like I did in 2007. Hopefully it will have that same boost effect it did last time. Only time will tell. Let's hope my BL sisters can help me, help myself to get to where I want to be. I'm tired of struggling to keep the weight off. It's emotionally exhausting. 

I start today. 

I'll keep you posted on the progress. 

*deep sigh*

Here is my profile description for the BL page. 

My Journey

My journey is not unique, it's like everyone else's who struggles with weight loss and gain. I woke up one day, looked at pictures and realized I had to make a change. And I did...that year.

It was winter 2006 and I had joined the Biggest Loser, trying to find someone, something to motivate me. I connected with a wonderful group of women, my Dynamic Diva Sisters. (I was formerly known as ArmeWfe.) Through early 2007 and into spring they pushed me through challenges that got me losing weight, and toning muscle. I went from 180 lbs down to 157 lbs at my lightest. Then our group moved to Sparkpeople, and for me it was downhill from there. Summer vacations, work schedules, children, deployments and life in general moved in a direction that saw me yo-yo-ing through different sizes and weights. Every year it was the same crap "I'll lose it this year!" "I'll train for (fill in the blank) this year." And every year it was the same disappointment. Every year it was the same excuses and and hard truths to face. That was every year until last year. We moved to Germany in summer 2011, and I no longer was working full-time. I had time, and less responsibilities and I found a friend. We started working out, training for a triathlon. At first it was hard, and then it was great. I was running 4 miles! Something I had NEVER done. We were swimming and biking. We started a hybrid of P90X and Insanity. The weight was coming off (not fast) but more importantly I felt healthy and I was stronger. Then summer happened, and traveling, and summer turned into winter and winter turned into more excuses.

Now it's a new year and I am promising myself all over again that I will get it together, and do it this time. Except I looked at my SparkPeople account, and I have said that every year since 2008 after I gained all my weight back. I haven't seen 157 lbs since early summer of 2007. I would like to see it again. I am hoping I will do it and make the habits stick this time.

The girls are back in town, my Diva Sisters, and we are back on the BL. Let's hope we can do this again. I did it last time with my girls and I have faith in their motivating capabilities. I am hopeful I will persevere this time.

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Bright Ideas

New Year's and the damn resolutions. Who's idea is that anyways? Overzealous people trying to make the whole world miserable. 

This year I joined a new bandwagon. I decided that I wasn't resolving to get fit, but instead resolving to change my lifestyle. Sounds so deep and introspective doesn't it? It was. Let's just see how long it lasts. 

My friend Jill and I decided that with all the time we had on our hands, and I don't mean a few hours but Desperate Housewives amount of time, that we should make good use of our time and train for a triathlon. Jill was a tri vet, and I was willing to try. Together we would be great motivation for each other. Right? It's comical more than anything, and most days we are like Mutt & Jeff. 

Regardless, we have been pretty steady at working out since January. However, we have not really done the whole change the way you eat part. We have been absolutely HORRID about what we shovel in, shovel being the operative word here. Often times leaving the gym to sit and eat at Chili's. 

Don't judge. It's not our fault. Who in the hell puts a Chili's across the parking lot from a gym? It was either Chili's or Popeye's. I think we made a pretty damn good choice given our options. (Well we thought we were making the better choice.) We always went in with good intentions, and 9 times out of 10 we ordered salads. Awesome! 

Except, we weren't seeing any results. 

So I was talking to my BFF back in the states and she mentioned having recently lost 32 pounds with Weight Watchers. Yup, the light bulb went off in my brain. I thought 'hell that is what I need!' I need to monitor what I eat, count some points, rack up the weight loss. Yeah! That's it!

So I joined Weight Watchers online. Then I looked into the salads we have been ordering at Chili's, just for shits and giggles. I can't remember what came first: the shits or the giggles. 

Quesadilla Explosion salad from Chili's: 906 calories. 

Who the f*ck can pack that many calories into a damned salad? Only a chain restaurant. And why call it a salad? Why not call it "Whole day's caloric intake Bowl"? Yea not so catchy. 

I don't think I could have picked a more crappy salad to order at Chili's, it they had disclosed the caloric intake. I feel like a dumb ass! The damned burgers have less calories!

Chili's you broke my heart. 

And the bright ideas just kept on coming... We didn't stop with Weight Watchers. We decided we needed to up our game. Really get into losing weight. We were gonna do this! YEAH!

There I was looking on the internet for ways to shed pounds and potentially kill ourselves. Found it! A P90X-Insanity Hybrid Workout. Heard of P90X but not so sure about Insanity? Look at the name they gave it, it says it all. Lucky, or unlucky for me, we have both sets of DVDs in my home. 

Yea, we started that on Monday. All I can say is HOLY HELL! I am so sore from Day 1 of P90X and Day 2 of Insanity. I am so sore that typing feels like a cardio workout for my arms. 

Tomorrow is Day 3 and we will see how that goes. I believe we are working back and arms. I'm going to "Give it my best and forget the rest" and "Dig Deep". Let's see what other bright ideas I come up with. I am praying my light bulb stays dim, and no more a-ha revelations. Not sure my body can handle it. 

Cardio Blast

Yup that is the name of the two hour session I did today! It was great! We did cardio-kickboxing and then we started on the cardio-core workout. However that instructor was a bit less organized than our kickboxing instructor, and so we ditched the class and went to the track. We ran/walked a little over 1 mile. I can feel it in my legs now as I sit here and type away. I am going to be sore as hell tomorrow. Actually I might be sore as hell tonight! But I wouldn't have it any other way.

My only problem is that I can't see any results. I mean my jeans are fitting better and my muffin top is slowing un-puffing itself. I look more like a mini-muffin than one of the full sized ones, but still it's really hard to tell.  I couldn't tell ya' if the weight is coming off because I am afraid of the scale.

See it lies to me. If I move it to one room, it reads one thing. Move it to another room. Totally different weight. And I am not talking about ounces here. I am talking a full 5-8 pounds difference. Now for someone who is training, ok trying to train, for a triathlon and in a local Biggest Loser Competition (BLC), I don't need that type of fluctuating scale. I need accuracy. I need positive reassurance, not taunting numbers. So I just stay the hell away from it!

Last night though I got a bit of reassurance from a friend I hadn't seen in two weeks. She is our third member of our BLC team. She said she could see it in my waist area and in my face that I was losing weight. She said my face didn't look as round. Shit... I didn't realize I had a moon pie face to begin with. Apparently my cheeks round out when I am a bit on the chubby side. The point: someone noticed all my efforts.

That is a reward all by itself. I won't lie. I need the reassurance. I can't see the difference. I CAN feel the difference. My wobbly bits are a bit less wobbly. My endurance is better. I can get through more of the cardio-kickboxing without a break. But I need/want to SEE the results. I want to start to look like my kickboxing instructor...ok that might be a far stretch but I want to look better not just feel better.

Maybe I need to take a before picture and then I can compare it to an after picture. That might really help to "show" me the changes that are taking place. I have the numbers they gave me when they did my initial weigh in, but I am not crazy about those numbers. So I am kinda ignoring them.  The running further and lasting longer is helping but I need more motivation. I need to experience greater results. I think I am going to set up a workout/training schedule. That might get me where I need to go... trained for this triathlon.

How do you notice changes in weight loss in your body? What helps to motivate you when you are trying to achieve a goal? Any training tips or workouts you would like to share would be great.

There are two of us training for the triathlon sprint this summer, and we are also going to cram in a half-marathon. I think. I might be overambitious with that one.

Any help or info welcomed!

Biggest Loser Challenge

Yup so in addition to this workout getting fit plan, I have joined two of my friends in the Biggest Loser Challenge they are sponsoring at the Air Force Fitness Center here on Ramstein AB. So yesterday was our scheduled weigh-in/measurement taking. As my husband always says "the numbers don't lie." Well the story they were telling yesterday was a story of too much indulging and too little exercise. The story isn't what I'm worried about, its the perspective of the story. Let me explain.

So when we arrive to get measured there are two women doing the weigh-in and measurements. Both pleasant and seemingly knowledgeable....great! So as we go through the process, I get on the scale. Luck would have it that it didn't break and my weight was right where I expected it to be...in the mid 180s heavy. Then she hands me this thing-y that looks like a PS3 controller. She tells me to grip it and it will tell her my BMI. Wait a minute? You mean to tell me a controller is going to tell you how much fat is in my body. I've played PS3 before and it has never told me I'm fat. But ok... I grip it and hold for a about a minute and then she plucks it from my hands and scribbles down the numbers. Do you think she tells me what they are? Or explains anything...nope. I saw something in upper 20s. I'll assume that when dealing with weight and health high numbers- bad, low numbers- good.

Now comes the fun part: tape measurements. That's what I want! I large pink tape measure wrapped around my mid-section. Did I mention it has numbers on it? She measures my neck. Sweet. Never tells me my measurements. I forget to look. She measures my waist. I lean over to see what she writes. it was in the 30s. Again....doesn't seem like a good number, but at least it was lower than my age which is 37. Then my hips. This is where I have major issues. She doesn't measure at my hip bone. She measures around my a$$! Really??? Do you think I have a shot of winning ANYTHING now? That of course was in the 40s. UGH!

As if the numbers aren't bad enough, they proceed to take pictures of your fat self. "So you can see the progress." Thanks for nothing. First shot is head on while you hold out a number. The next is a profile/mug shot with this number held out to the side. I am convict 382. That's my contestant number. Uggh...fat pictures. Don't I have enough of those already?

So what do we next? Do we get on the treadmills? Do we try twenty minutes on the elliptical? How about a cardio class? Nah! We leave the gym and shoot the breeze outside the gym. Where one of those measuring ladies walks out and smiles and waves at us. Twenty minutes later she returns to find us still talking outside the gym and says to us quite pompously: "you could have walked 4 laps in the time you stood here gabbing, ladies." As if I didn't know I needed to exercise, now the Weights and Measures Police is going to shame me into exercising. I felt like I had gotten caught smoking in the girls restroom by my teacher. The nerve of some people! We did exercise later that afternoon. Not because she shamed us, but because we had it planned all along.

Either way....its week two of this new me and while she is tired and pooped more often, she is also learning to do more for herself and enjoying the workouts. Today I have to sub so I am missing yoga with my girls, but tomorrow is a new day. And I will get some exercise in.... if it kills me. Between the crappy numbers/measuring and shameful instructors, it just might.

Trying to be a Triathlete Ain't Easy

So I attempted to post about my triathlon training and something happened to my post. Going to try to get it together again...it went something like this:

So there I was exercising this week, four days to be exact, and I was so sore that I could barely stand let alone get up and down the stairs. We did yoga, circuit training, more yoga, swimming and more swimming. At the end I had a productive week of feeling fulfilled, and sore in places I had forgotten I had muscles. Amazing! What is all this training for you ask? Well many of you may have seen the movie Bucket List or know what a bucket list is about. I have been wanting (for about 4 years now) to try a triathlon or a half-marathon. I know, I know sounds crazy. I don't care about the time or if I puke my way across the finish line, I just want to say "I've done that". So through my husband's work I've made a friend and we decided to train for a triathlon this spring/summer. EXCITING! Perfect excuse to get fit and start to feel more energized. At the moment I am feeling pooped, but I am sure that will get better. (Please God it has to get better!) We are off to a great start. We might've even got a bit overzealous by joining a local Biggest loser competition. Only time will tell if we bit off more than a mouthful. We do our official BL weigh-in on Wednesday. While scary and potentially embarrassing, I plan on posting my numbers right here. Maybe I can shame myself fit if all else fails.

I didn't realize just how challenging the entire triathlon training would be, but I gotta say I am not only excited to be doing it I'm excited to tell people. The thing that excites me the most though, is showing my children that you are never too old to chase a dream and you are capable of accomplishing anything. So I won't be called by the Olympic team to represent the U.S. and I won't be giving any Kenyans a run for their money. However, this mom is teaching her kids a lesson far greater than winning and that is perseverance. Hey wait...I think that is part of resolution too...yea I'm trying to stick with that as well.

A new year, A new ME!

So after this internal debate about whether to have a resolution or a list or a mantra or a not list, I've finally decided. I'm sure you have been waiting on bated breath for this earth shattering revelation! ;)  I have decided for option E: All of the above. So my New Year's resolution is finish what I started. It is pretty simple right? I am not looking to lose 50 pounds or quit eating sweets or something so ridiculously difficult like that. I mean really? The problems with New Year's resolutions is that they are so unrealistic you set yourself up for automatic failure. So I resolve to finish what I started. That means any project, endeavor, bright idea that I have I am going to see it through to the end, even if it kills me.

Next is my mantra. I wanted a single word, but couldn't really decide on the word I wanted. So I have come up with something that is very much tied into my resolution: "I am committed to persevering." Now I am not sure that it falls into the textbook definition of a mantra, but it is working for me. It makes me feel good and it sums up what 2012 is going to be about for me. So I think its perfect!

Next is my list. The list consists of DOs and DON'Ts. They are essentially things that I want to make sure I accomplish this year and things that I resolve to stop doing. So let's start with the positive, the to do list which is more of a smaller scaled version of bucket list. It is smaller so that I can add to it throughout the year if there is something I really want to do, but its short enough that I don't overwhelm myself and get nothing done.

TO DO in 2012:

1. Train and COMPLETE a triathlon AND half-marathon before the end of the year.

2. Learn a third language. (I'm living in Europe! Why shouldn't I pick up a 3 language?)

3. Complete a crocheted scarf and afghan before the end of the year. (The hard part is done since I taught myself how to crochet last month. The harder part is going to be perfecting it all!)

4. Travel more- again we are living in Europe.... need I explain more.

5. Spend more time with my kids and husband.


Now here is the list of things I am NOT going to do, or maybe a better way of saying that is to STOP doing. I have no doubt that these things can only improve my life.

NOT TO DO in 2012:
1. I will NOT associate with people that cause drama in my life.

2. I will NOT beat myself up about my weight, appearance or other physical characteristic.

3. I will NOT allow my children to get away with not doing chores anymore. My not working does not equal a new maid in town.

4. I will NOT feel guilty for saying NO.

5. I will NOT feel guilty for saying YES.


Hopefully as I get through my To Do List and stick to my Not To Do List I will be a better me in 2012. Because ultimately that is the whole point of a New Year's resolution, to be the best you in the new year and that is exactly what I intend to do.

Cheers to everyone who is starting the new year with the goal of being the best YOU you can be.

Chunky Monkey

So I started this blog with the idea that I would have a place to ramble, and more positively...follow my own weight loss/training. Well I suck at both. I ramble to myself and not on my blog, and after a weekend of binging...I am no closer to my weight loss goals or 5k training than I was weeks ago. So what's next?
I haven't figured that out, but I am moving towards losing weight. I have a Biggest Loser Challenge that we are doing at work, and I have joined. But now I feel like a blob because I haven't done crap this week. I need motivation, but that seems harder to find than the sheer will not be fat. Suggestions always welcomed!  I am feeling like a chunky monkey and wish me a good luck as I quest for the Skinny Minnie trapped inside of me.