Rearing Ugliness

Rough afternoon with Bear yesterday. He accused me of never having such an intense interest in his "school stuff" before this year. He told me that my "nose was always in his business".  He implied it was because I'm not working.  He also told me that he only goes to Scouts because I will make him feel guilty if he doesn't. Really? WTF??? I wish I could say that I am angry, but I am more heart broken than anything. I pride myself in being a good mommy! Maybe not 100% of the time, but 95% is still an A. And after all that I been through with Bear and all that we have worked to achieve it was a slap in the face. Yea so let's see....

1. You were no walk in the park Bear! Your success now is largely dependent on all the hard work we put in those first 8 years. Yea and I was present for those as well!

2. My nose wouldn't have to be in Bear's business if he wasn't constantly misplacing homework. He did a book report on Monday that wasn't due until Wednesday. GREAT JOB! He was supposed to turn it in on Tuesday. Monday night the book report goes into the backpack. Tuesday afternoon- it's been stolen. REALLY? Who want to steal a book report Bear??? Those people that don't like him! OMG! More drama than on TNT!  So now we are back to re-doing the book report. Lovely. As if it wasn't agony the first time he worked on it. Let's go for round 2 of that heavyweight fight.

3. Scouts is for me? Since when? I mean don't get me wrong, I love the fact that he is in Scouts but I get nothing out of it other than pride at seeing him accomplish something. That and he looks adorable in his uniform and the outings here in Europe are pretty badass. We went to Bastogne for crying out loud!. I just want him to have something that he can be proud of and carry it with him. Needless to say that he has been in Scouts since 1st grade. Seriously, he could have abandoned it when we got here to Germany but instead we found a Pack and got quite a bit accomplished. He will be receiving his Arrow of Light which is the highest achievement you can receive in Cub Scouts. But somehow that is inspired by guilt....sheeesshhhh DRAAAMMMAA KING!

4. He should be grateful that I am actively involved. Many parents don't give two craps about their kids. I know... I taught many a child who's parents were absent, AT BEST.  My parents never toted me around to Scouts, swim lessons, movies, and whatever else I wanted to do. My parents did NOT give me a gaming system, hell I didn't have my own radio until I was 15. Ugghh... to be so lucky as to have parents who want to be parents!

5. He complained in 3rd and 4th grade because I had to work and couldn't be like the other moms (SAHMs) who go on field trips and bake cupcakes. Guess what buddy? I am that mom now and you don't want her now! Make up your mind.


So how did I resolve the issue? I do what I always do....got angry, cried, and told him that I couldn't care more about school then he did. That I couldn't care about scouts more than he did. That if he didn't want it so be it. He responded with "you said I couldn't still live here and drop out of school". WTF? Oh yea...he wants to drop out of school. He hates it that much. He has begged me to home school him. But he doesn't know that I would fail us both in math! :(


So today I resolved to make him finish what he started. No easy way out for you Buster Bear! You are finishing Cub Scouts and you'll get it completed, if it kills me. And it just might...

How does one raise a wanna be Drama King Drop Out Boy?


HELP!!!!!

It's Okay in Deutschland

Today I am linking up with the WhisperingWriter at Airing My Dirt Laundry, One Sock at a Time for "Hey, It's Okay Tuesday (or any day)." It's a hilarious blog and great fun to read! So today I am going to join her in listing the things that I am Okay with being Okay with. Okay?

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Hey It's okay...

    ...that my house isn't 100% spotless. No one notices but me anyways.



    ...that I bought 4 different laundry detergents to get my laundry to smell like my friend Jill's laundry. See my son stayed over at her house for 4 days and loved the way his laundry smelled. So he asked me to get his laundry to smell "like Ms. Jill's does". Thanks Jill!



    ...that I miss my husband like crazy! I even miss him constantly groping and grabbing me, because that would mean that he was actually here.



   ....that I miss my DirecTv and DVR. I haven't watched real TV since we got here in July, and I miss American TV dammit!



   ...that I worked out for 140 minutes tonight only to top it off with a Popeye's biscuit. Seriously, who puts a Popeye's across the street from the gym? Only the Air Force.



   ...that I have grey hairs that my children think is hilarious to pluck out, and I let them. Vanity much?



   ...that I talked to my parents more now as a result of distance and Voxer than I ever did when we lived stateside. Feeling like a crappy daughter these days.



   ...that I miss my friends, my old job and my old house. I feel like a stranger in a strange land except I have my family and things with me. Wait doesn't that make it home now?



   ...that I was invited to attend a birthday party at the pub that I work at. The kicker is that I am working that night, so isn't attendance mandatory? Should I even RSVP?


   ...that I have to be in the top three for Bejeweled Blitz every week, and I work to make sure that I am.

And it's just the first week. ;)

   

 

Cardio Blast

Yup that is the name of the two hour session I did today! It was great! We did cardio-kickboxing and then we started on the cardio-core workout. However that instructor was a bit less organized than our kickboxing instructor, and so we ditched the class and went to the track. We ran/walked a little over 1 mile. I can feel it in my legs now as I sit here and type away. I am going to be sore as hell tomorrow. Actually I might be sore as hell tonight! But I wouldn't have it any other way.

My only problem is that I can't see any results. I mean my jeans are fitting better and my muffin top is slowing un-puffing itself. I look more like a mini-muffin than one of the full sized ones, but still it's really hard to tell.  I couldn't tell ya' if the weight is coming off because I am afraid of the scale.

See it lies to me. If I move it to one room, it reads one thing. Move it to another room. Totally different weight. And I am not talking about ounces here. I am talking a full 5-8 pounds difference. Now for someone who is training, ok trying to train, for a triathlon and in a local Biggest Loser Competition (BLC), I don't need that type of fluctuating scale. I need accuracy. I need positive reassurance, not taunting numbers. So I just stay the hell away from it!

Last night though I got a bit of reassurance from a friend I hadn't seen in two weeks. She is our third member of our BLC team. She said she could see it in my waist area and in my face that I was losing weight. She said my face didn't look as round. Shit... I didn't realize I had a moon pie face to begin with. Apparently my cheeks round out when I am a bit on the chubby side. The point: someone noticed all my efforts.

That is a reward all by itself. I won't lie. I need the reassurance. I can't see the difference. I CAN feel the difference. My wobbly bits are a bit less wobbly. My endurance is better. I can get through more of the cardio-kickboxing without a break. But I need/want to SEE the results. I want to start to look like my kickboxing instructor...ok that might be a far stretch but I want to look better not just feel better.

Maybe I need to take a before picture and then I can compare it to an after picture. That might really help to "show" me the changes that are taking place. I have the numbers they gave me when they did my initial weigh in, but I am not crazy about those numbers. So I am kinda ignoring them.  The running further and lasting longer is helping but I need more motivation. I need to experience greater results. I think I am going to set up a workout/training schedule. That might get me where I need to go... trained for this triathlon.

How do you notice changes in weight loss in your body? What helps to motivate you when you are trying to achieve a goal? Any training tips or workouts you would like to share would be great.

There are two of us training for the triathlon sprint this summer, and we are also going to cram in a half-marathon. I think. I might be overambitious with that one.

Any help or info welcomed!

Money 101

Warning....the following post is going to sound a lot like a bitch session. Language can will be slightly foul.

So if you've read my last post, Lessons in Fiscal Responsibility, you will know where this is coming from. Without having to recap to much of that post, I am teaching trying to teach my daughter some financial responsibility. That said, apparently I should keep my day job because I am failing epically. Oh shit wait! I am a teacher by trade, so what does that tell me? 

Anywho, let's pick up where that post left off. Her January cell phone bill posts to my account. Now remember we are living overseas. Her cell plan isn't half of what we had in the states and it costs about the same as one of the higher end plans by Verizon. There is NO unlimited texting to all cell phones, only to those in your same carrier. There is NO unlimited calling except to those in your same carrier. There are also charges per call for calling land lines. Of course as with any cell plan, go over your allotments and get raped on charges. Truthfully it's a shitty plan, but it's what they have here and it's what she agreed to. Wait! Did I mention that you don't get a paper bill, going green bullshit, and I can't get them to update my email so that I can get the emailed bills? Also, in Germany when you sign for these contracts they automatically deduct the payment from your account. Yea... it's friggin' awsome! So back to the story... the bill posts my account. $262 DOLLARS. Yup big text and all. I too choked when I saw it. Her bill is usually around the $100 range. I was like WTF??? FUMING! So I try not to flip shit on her and simply asked her what the hell happened? She was wide eyed and flabbergasted at the amount. Not to mention that she knows how much she already owes me. We'll get to that later! So I ask her "what the hell are you doing with your cell phone that you are racking up charges in the amount of $262 dollars?" Of course.... as you expected, she has no idea. Actually she thinks it's my cell phone that racked up those charges. So I call the cell carrier and confirm that indeed it's hers. So what now?

Well I'm pissed! To add insult to injury she walked in the other with $30 yoga pants and a new shirt. WTF?!?! I asked her where she got them from... so-and-so bought them for me. Really???? REALLLY???!!! Oh my dear! I am ready to strangle her! So I took a more logical approach. I need to teach a lesson...lesson...lesson...lesson. I keep repeating it because it keeps me from smacking her upside her head, and at 16 that approach is not very effective. So I repeat...lesson...lesson...lesson.

The lesson in money management. That is the lesson. 

I go to my handy dandy Xcel and create an invoice. Oh did I fail to mention she has been friggin' going haywire with her iTunes purchases as well? Yup that too is accumulating. So I create a very official business-like invoice. I included Decembers cell bill, all the iTunes that she has purchased since the cell phone bill posted in late December and then added her January cell bill. Here is the lesson part. Wait for it...wait for it. Late charges!!! Hey if this were a real cell phone bill, they would have cut it off already. Since I can't do that and not have a boat load of penalties, this is the next best thing. 

I added a 2% interest charge to all of December charges which are now past due. Granted it was only three bucks but it's the point. If you are going to play with the adults then you play by the adult rules. 

I haven't sat down and explained the invoice to her, but I will. My husband, who is in other parts, agreed with this plan. Now let's see if we can get it to work. Maybe the fact that she owes $472 between two cell phone bills and iTunes is enough to jar her ass back to reality. Maybe she pick up more shifts at her work to pay it off. I may go down and still take the money from her account. Am I relieving her of the responsibility of paying her bill? She is still "out" the money, but if I get it myself then she didn't really pay it. I don't know. I am confused and talking in damned circles. I just need her to understand that financial responsibilities should not be taken lightly. Ever. 

It's frustrating as hell, and I hate being the bitch. However, I feel like if I don't do it now she may never understand what it is to live within your means. I love her to pieces and being the only girl she really is my princess. But I have to do right by her and this feels like tough love. Am I wrong? Am I doing the right thing? Comments and suggestions are always welcomed.